Congratulations! You’ve purchased Deep Cell, the first video game to feature Total Immersion Play (TIP). This incredible interactive experience is unprecedented in video console technology, and will place you inside the mind of a deadly anti-terrorist special operative in a way you would never have imagined possible from a game.
In order have the optimum Deep Cell experience, here are a few reminders about how to run the game. By following these simple guidelines, TIP games will provide you with the extreme play experience you deserve.
1. Deep Cell can only play with the Vivendi SuperSet console. TIP games are incompatible with Sony Playstation, Nintendo Wii, Microsoft Xbox, PC or Macintosh computers, or the Fuji Universal Game Unit. If you have not purchased the Vivendi SuperSet, you will need to do this prior to playing Deep Cell. However, each copy of Deep Cell contains a coupon for $29.95 off the Vivendi SuperSet, making it available to you for the low price of $2,770.04.
2. During game play, a number of scenes contain flashing light displays that can trigger epileptic seizure. This is intentional, as the “Epileptic Seizure” scene is a key story element in the Deep Cell plot arc. If you are not prone to epileptic seizures, please take the pills contained in the TIP Accessory Pack at the indicated time, which will fully simulate epilepsy. If you do not wish to enjoy the full Total Immersion Play experience, set the difficulty rating to “Pansy” prior to beginning play.
3. A key feature of the Deep Cell Total Immersion Play experience is that the game continues even after you shut off the Vivendi SuperSet ($3,299.99 retail excluding required accessories, mandatory 2-year service subscription, and proprietary ISP contract). This means that you’ll be in the game even when you’re out of the game! Don’t forget to hook up the headphones and SuperSet Electrode Headset that came in your TIP Accessory Pack prior to going to sleep, so your dreams will be filled with high-action, thrill-a-minute death trips that characterize the incredible terror-filled world of Deep Cell. This way you’ll be able to maintain the tense, ultra-violent mood of the world’s greatest spy action game, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Studies have indicated that more than three nights of exposure to the Electrode Headset can cause permanent physical and mental side effects, so use caution, and be aware that you have waived any and all rights to legal action against Vivendi by opening the box containing both the game disc and these instructions.
4. One of the most exciting features of Deep Cell is its online interactivity. Thanks to the mandatory high-speed web connection kit that came in your TIP Accessory Pack, every second you play, your Vivendi SuperSet ($4,499.99 retail) is constantly sending signals to Vivendi’s servers noting the personal information you entered prior to beginning play as well as your in-game routines, habits and progress in the story. In return, the servers feed back data that alters and changes the game as you play, tailor-made to your individual style! This ensures that you will be exposed to a brilliantly adaptive, ever-changing game perfectly suited to your needs and desires. We have also discovered, since the release of Version 4.2.1 of Deep Cell, that it also ensures that a record of your private data, as well as certain keywords such as “terrorism”, “assassination” and “insurgent”, are registered with a number of government intelligence and law enforcement agencies. Unfortunately (and, our Legal Department assures us, non-liably), this has resulted in a statistically small number of Deep Cell players being arrested and detained by operatives of the Department of Homeland Security. We can assure you, however, that this not only adds a profound new level of depth to the Total Immersion Play experience, but also serves as a ‘badge of honor’ to signal to other players how good you really are at this game.