HNYIC

HNYIC

29

Dec

2013

LeonardPierce.com will be taking the next few days off to celebrate the coming of the new year.  Have a happy holiday, wherever and whoever you are, and I hope to see you here the first week of 2014 for some dad-blasted new content and other surprises.  Cheers! ...
MORE...

Go Gamecocks

Go Gamecocks

27

Dec

2013

"Coach Ryan, if you want to fight me on this, I'm absolutely prepared to go over your head.""Jennifer, I can assure you, it's...""Remember, you're just the athletic director. If you think I'm not willing to talk to the president of the university, you're sadly mistaken.""I just don't feel it's an appropriate sport for a co- ...
MORE...

The Solicitor

The Solicitor

25

Dec

2013

Joe --Sorry so long in getting back to you. I've been absolutely swamped these days. I've got an ox-cart driver who's all wound up in this no-fault insurance business, I got a guy who says he got typhus from that crazy bastard out in Jordan who dunks people underwater, I got an ugly custody battle going all the way back to ...
MORE...

Christmas Telephone Call from a Worker North of Reykjavik

Christmas Telephone Call from a Worker North of Reykjavik

24

Dec

2013

"Hello?""Merry Christmas, mom!""Robert! Oh, thank you, son! I didn't think you'd have time to call me today.""No, it's cool. I'm on my break. Even up here, we get OSHA.""So you're still working for that man.""Yes, mom.""You haven't thought about going back to school.""To get my Asian Studies degree? Have you got any idea wh ...
MORE...

Read On Your Own Time

Read On Your Own Time

23

Dec

2013

MERRY CHRISTMASYes, the holidays are approaching, the time when we celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. We wish you all the best of seasons, and hope you will celebrate in a devout and solemn manner, as opposed to the drunken revels of the hated Saxon. Just as a reminder, anyone found d ...
MORE...

Merry Christmas, Baby, Please Come Home

Merry Christmas, Baby, Please Come Home

19

Dec

2013

Darling,I know that you said you didn't want to see me, or hear from me. But I think this card complies fully with the court's order of protection, provided I do not hand-deliver it to you. I know it just looks like a cheap 89-cent greeting card manufactured in 1986 and purchased from a dusty, underused spin-rack at a truck ...
MORE...

Everyone’s a Critic, II

Everyone’s a Critic, II

15

Dec

2013

In 2013, the 'death of the critic' bell that has been sounding since the birth of the internet finally reached a fevered, Chuck-Berry-style ding-a-ling.  Film critics were especially hard-hit by algorithms, aggregators, and amateurism, the so-called "Five As" referred to by badly educated but enthusiastic bloggers.  Strip ...
MORE...

Everyone’s a Critic, I

Everyone’s a Critic, I

9

Dec

2013

This is, of course, the time that we — and by we, I mean the fraternity (am I right, fellas?) of culture critics, publicly self-disgraced and privately self-abased, look back on the year that was and present, once and for all, our picks for the objectively greatest music and films of the year. These selections are never w ...
MORE...

Last Post About Satan

Last Post About Satan

8

Dec

2013

ED "SCUPPER" HELMOND, VICE-PRESIDENT, BAKERSFIELD CHAPTER, SATAN'S SERVANTS M.C.: "Well, I'll be honest with you, man.  We didn't used to be called Satan's Servants. Before this, we were the Rough Riders, and before that, back in '49 when the club was first founded, we were actually called the Rosedale Rol ...
MORE...

The Stately Homes of Blingland

The Stately Homes of Blingland

4

Dec

2013

Welcome to Rapsylvania!I'm your tour guide, Sharon, and I'll be sharin' with you -- ha ha -- some of the sights, sounds and stories of this, the palatial mansion of Spin-L.P., the biggest-selling recording artist in the history of hip-hop. There is no food or drink on the tour, and due to the mad levels of ice in the estate ...
MORE...

100 Guns from Now

100 Guns from Now

2

Dec

2013

1.  The Maltese Falcon (Warner Bros., October 3, 1941; John Huston, dir.)2.  This Gun for Hire (Paramount, May 13, 1942; Frank Tuttle, dir.)3.  Double Indemnity (Paramount, September 6, 1944; Billy Wilder, dir.)4.  Laura (20th Century FOX, October 11, 1944; Otto Preminger, dir.)5.  Murder, My Sweet (RKO Radio Pictures ...
MORE...