It was Eddie Wolz who first come to me with the idea. He says his brother Chick has this guy needs a favor. A long time ago, before Chick Wooley was on the cover of Look, this guy done him a favor, sort of helped him get over in the …
To: Dr. Carl Wynand <cwynand@sci.duke.edu> From: Dr. Alyssa Stark-Palatine <astark_p@sci.duke.edu> Subject: Progress on Project Bedtime Carl — I appreciate the time and effort you put into Project Bedtime. And I know it’s a prestige project; it’s already a big name in the journals, and there’s a lot of Hollywood …
“Hey!” “What? I can’t hear you.” “HEY!” “I can’t hear you from up here. Let me come down there.” “You can’t park that thing here.” “What’s that, friend?” “You can’t — what is that thing? You can’t park that here.” “I thought this was a parking lot.” “It is, but…” …
The first-time visitor will, first of all, want to blend in, and second of all, amass a large personal fortune under the local economic system. This allows the advance scout to make preparations for the invasion in privacy and solitude. Don’t be taken in by counterproductive rhetoric: money does matter. …
Hello, I’m Gary Owens. You may remember me as the voice of beloved cartoon superhero Space Ghost, or from my many appearances on television’s Laugh-In. But what I’d like to talk to you about tonight is no laughing matter. It’s Labor Day Weekend, and as I do every year at …
They were crossing the bridge, on the way to meet the client, and the boy wouldn’t stop talking about Zen. The hotel where the client wanted to meet was just ahead. Anagnostakis liked to walk whenever possible, to avoid the cameras in parking garages. This was one of the many …
I AM DEEPLY HURT BY YOUR CALLING ME A MILK BABY. I AM NOT. BUT I AM A MONSTER. I AM THE “SON OF TWINKLES” I AM A LITTLE “PUSS” WHEN MOTHER TWINKLES GETS DRUNK SHE GETS FRISKY. SHE EATS HER CHILDREN. SOMETIMES SHE PICKS THEM UP BY THE SCRUFF …
“Hello, DynoTech Solutions, can I help you?” “Yes, I’m calling about a problem I’m having with my external hard drive.” “Can I put you on hold for just a moment?” “Sure.” ” … ” “Uh…hello?” “Yes, sir?” “Are you there?” “Yes, sir, can I help you?” “Yeah, I was calling …
BRAHMA: Come on, guys, let’s get a move on here. I want to get home before the next Maha Yuga. VISHNU: I need a drink. SHIVA: You need six drinks. Maybe then you’ll pass out. V: Eat it. B: Seriously. Let’s just figure this out, it shouldn’t be taking this …
An average-looking young white guy in his mid-20s rolls out of bed in a meager apartment. He brushes his teeth, puts on deodorant, and so on. Eventually, he sits down, picks up a phone, and dials a number, holding some paperwork in his other hand. “Hi, this is Tim Patrick. …
DUNGEON MASTER RICHIE – Who’s on point? KEVIN – Hillyard. HILLYARD – The hell I am! BENNY – You are, Hilly. You agreed to run point for me when I sold you my +2 short sword back in East Wind Dell. H – Fuck. DM – Okay. K – What was that …
Stand down, oppressors! Your days of dominance are finished; your time of reckoning is at hand! You have stood on our necks for too long. You have excluded us from many of the finest professions; you have prevented us from becoming educated; you have made us second- and third-class citizens …
If you are like me, you have a normal morning pre-work routine that consists of checking various websites and social media, which prepares you for the day of labor by making you incredibly depressed, angry and/or resentful before you even arrive on the job. So why not monetize it? …
ADDICTION SOLITAIRE. Can you make all cards match in descending suits before the junk sickness weakens you? A delightful romp through the worlds of both heroin abuse and online card games. BLACKJACK. Play a game of “21” with a slick Las Vegas sharpster. Later, after you lose, sneak up behind …
Kwa-Ra-Neema, they called him. “The Good Chief”. Christ knows what the Comanch called him, in their heathen tongue, but the ones who learnt English said he was the Good Chief. The Good Man. The Friend of the White Man. Most of the folks I knew, the decent folks, called him …
