Deep Beneath the Skin: Hannibal‘s Flowers of Evil

Deep Beneath the Skin:  <i>Hannibal</i>‘s Flowers of Evil

20

Apr

2014

The character of Hannibal Lecter has had a difficult journey over the years.  The charming, terrifying psychiatrist and serial killer has made his creator, Thomas Harris, very rich, and has become what is know in our media-savvy age as a 'franchise', but the artistic merit of that franchise is a decidedly mixed bag.  Harr ...
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Flagging Plotlines

Flagging Plotlines

18

Apr

2014

LOCAL MAN FRUSTRATED BY IMPLAUSIBLE MASTURBATION FANTASIESCLEVELAND (AP) -- Local writer Jim Hennings, 36, blames a case of writer's block on his inability to masturbate for the last six days, claiming that he is unable to formulate a suitably plausible fantasy scenario."I've been blocked before," admits H ...
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Going to California

Going to California

16

Apr

2014

Dearest Ranjit,Greetings from America! How are you? How is your family? How is your uncle Jayanta? You should really speak to him about seeing a physician, as I am told that the gout can develop into something rather serious and unpleasant. Do you remember how poorly it turned out for our cousin Rupnath when he would not se ...
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The Most Beautiful Fraud: Under the Skin

The Most Beautiful Fraud:  <i>Under the Skin</i>

14

Apr

2014

Scarlett Johansson is, and I mean to do her no disservice by saying so, more a movie star than an actress.  She is one of those rare individuals in Hollywood who has attained a status so iconic that whether or not she actually delivers a good performance or a bad one is almost beside the point.  However, she is also still ...
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Quittin’ Time

Quittin’ Time

12

Apr

2014

"Hey, Arzbyx, what's up?""Please address me as Overlord Arzbyx the Supervisor, flesh thing, or I shall have you reduced to component chemicals and utilized as cleaning solution.""Hey, lighten up, boss man. It's Friday afternoon!""This necrotizer cannon is not going to build itself, Unit 46031-H.""So, you going to any ballg ...
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Chillin’ Like a Villain

Chillin’ Like a Villain

10

Apr

2014

I got out of the business back in '89, right before the bottom fell out. Nowadays there's not much room for competition. It's just like any business: once it gets going, and the big boys see that there's money to be made, they start buying up the smaller competitors, and squeezing out the rest. I mean, you can't even rob a ...
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Hello, My Name Is…

Hello, My Name Is…

8

Apr

2014

Open on the set of a gay porno film.  We see some hot action as the star, a mustachioed young fellow with a gold chain around his neck, throws it to a willowy blond stud.  He reaches a climax and the director cuts the action, giving the two a chance to rest.  The lead actor is none other than "hot property" Butt Reamers, ...
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The Monster, Mashed

The Monster, Mashed

6

Apr

2014

Don't get me wrong: I'm not bitter.A lot of people, they think I'm bitter, because of what happened. But I'm not. I'm not the kind of guy to be bitter. I had a good run. It's not like I ain't thankful for what I got. Believe me, I am. You know what life is like for most people like me? No matter what, at least I didn't end ...
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Jesus On The Main Line

Jesus On The Main Line

4

Apr

2014

"Well, how'd you know it was Him, Jimmy, is my question.""I just knowed it.""Now, how'd you 'just knowed' somethin' like that? You don't 'just know' that somebody's the Lord Jesus Christ returned to Earth.""Some things you just know, Clint. Like, instinctually.""What'd He look like?""About what you'd expect, really. Beard, ...
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Geekological Determinism

Geekological Determinism

2

Apr

2014

Wil Wheaton's career has described a curious arc around the atmosphere of pop culture.  He came to fame starring as Wesley Crusher in Star Trek:  The Next Generation, a teenage prodigy and transparent Mary Sue figure; though nerd culture was still a fringe activity and not the dominant force that it is today, Trek fans ...
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Taxing, Very Taxing

Taxing, Very Taxing

31

Mar

2014

Do You Have To File?Of course you have to file. What, do you think you're special or something? With your fancy lawyers, or your inability to speak English? You think that means you don't have to pay taxes? Well, surprise, surprise, Mr. I Think I'm Exempt From Government Regulations: you have to file. See w ...
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Styles is Wild, Bizarre, Bizarro

Styles is Wild, Bizarre, Bizarro

29

Mar

2014

Hello, nerds!  Welcome to Seattle.  In honor of your arrival in my town, and in lieu of the original content I had oped to present to you on sunday at ECCC, I present to you "Taking Acid and Talking About Superman With a House Full of Thalidomide Castoffs", or "Jimmy Olsen's Kookie Scoops" from Adventure Comics #287, Aug ...
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Between Impression and Expression: Robert Musil

Between Impression and Expression:  Robert Musil

27

Mar

2014

In earlier times, one had an easier conscience about being a person than one does today. People were like cornstalks in a field, probably more violently tossed back and forth by God, hail, fire, pestilence, and war than they are today; but as a whole -- as a city, a region, a field, and as to what personal movement was left ...
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Runnin’ with the Devil

Runnin’ with the Devil

25

Mar

2014

It was Eddie Wolz who first come to me with the idea. He says his brother Chick has this guy needs a favor. A long time ago, before Chick Wooley was on the cover of Look, this guy done him a favor, sort of helped him get over in the song-plugging business, and now the guy is having some labor problems, so he wants to know i ...
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More Fun Than Previous Projections Indicated

More Fun Than Previous Projections Indicated

23

Mar

2014

To: Dr. Carl Wynand <cwynand@sci.duke.edu>From: Dr. Alyssa Stark-Palatine <astark_p@sci.duke.edu>Subject: Progress on Project Bedtime Carl --I appreciate the time and effort you put into Project Bedtime. And I know it's a prestige project; it's already a big name in the journals, and there's a lot of Hollywood ...
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