Rebel posts that don’t fit the mold.
BILL: Okay, listen to this. BACON: Hit me. BILL: “But soft, what light…” BACON: Wait, what? Butt soft? Who’s he talking about? BILL: Juliet. BACON: He’s talking about how her butt is soft? What kind of shit is that? They’re never gonna let you say that. BILL: No, no, “but soft”. Like, …
Hey there, Nuremburg High class of 1919! Can it really be twenty years since we happy kampfers spent our final years as Fightin’ Teutons? Can it really be two decades since we welcomed home our fathers and older brothers and their remainig limbs from the final war Germany will ever …
“Sound off! What’s your name, asswipe?” “Uh…Alan Corwin.” “Bullshit! I can’t hear you, asswipe! Speak up like when you tell your girlfriend to tug on it! What’s your name, asswipe?” “Corwin. Alan Corwin. I’m from Document Control.” “Document Control? Is that what they’re calling it now? Bullshit! You’re a fucking file …
Dear Mrs. Oguntade, It was with joy and, I must admit, some degree of surprise that I received your e-mail of the 15th entitled “RE save our soul”. The joy, as you might imagine, stemmed from your generous though slightly bewildering offer to remit to me the kingly sum of USD$111,600,443 …
“Heil Hitler,” cutting through the air, bringing a chill to the summer night. I knew the voice, the curling insinuating sneer in it; there was no mistaking its owner. But I didn’t need to hear the voice to know it was Hessler. He was the only one that the men …
In the history of pornographic cinema, has the score of any film so perfectly mirrored the plot than in Adolfo Gotobed’s classic Push in the Bush? Performed by Pacoima’s own master craftsman of the bass sequencer, Lenny Stratocanticle, who met the director at one of Gregory Dark’s legendary wrap parties …
“Takin’ off the shirt, boss.” “You’re new.” “Yeah, they sent me up today. Christ, it’s hot. I’m really working up a good sweat. How does my hair look?” “Uh…okay, I guess. What are you in for?” “Nothing.” “Huh. Tell me about it. I’m totally fucking innocent, but I had this …
If there are two great bugaboos of the American conservative weltanschauung, they are the idea that socialism might ever possibly accomplish something unachievable by unfettered capitalism, and the idea that black people might actually be good for something other than forced labor. These terrors have manifested themselves in a number of …
LOCAL MAN FRUSTRATED BY IMPLAUSIBLE MASTURBATION FANTASIES CLEVELAND (AP) — Local writer Jim Hennings, 36, blames a case of writer’s block on his inability to masturbate for the last six days, claiming that he is unable to formulate a suitably plausible fantasy scenario. “I’ve been blocked before,” admits Hennings, whose credits …
Dearest Ranjit, Greetings from America! How are you? How is your family? How is your uncle Jayanta? You should really speak to him about seeing a physician, as I am told that the gout can develop into something rather serious and unpleasant. Do you remember how poorly it turned out …
“Hey, Arzbyx, what’s up?” “Please address me as Overlord Arzbyx the Supervisor, flesh thing, or I shall have you reduced to component chemicals and utilized as cleaning solution.” “Hey, lighten up, boss man. It’s Friday afternoon!” “This necrotizer cannon is not going to build itself, Unit 46031-H.” “So, you going to …
I got out of the business back in ’89, right before the bottom fell out. Nowadays there’s not much room for competition. It’s just like any business: once it gets going, and the big boys see that there’s money to be made, they start buying up the smaller competitors, and …
Open on the set of a gay porno film. We see some hot action as the star, a mustachioed young fellow with a gold chain around his neck, throws it to a willowy blond stud. He reaches a climax and the director cuts the action, giving the two a chance …
Don’t get me wrong: I’m not bitter. A lot of people, they think I’m bitter, because of what happened. But I’m not. I’m not the kind of guy to be bitter. I had a good run. It’s not like I ain’t thankful for what I got. Believe me, I am. …
“Well, how’d you know it was Him, Jimmy, is my question.” “I just knowed it.” “Now, how’d you ‘just knowed’ somethin’ like that? You don’t ‘just know’ that somebody’s the Lord Jesus Christ returned to Earth.” “Some things you just know, Clint. Like, instinctually.” “What’d He look like?” “About what …
